Sunday at the Village Vanguard

Here’s a quick question. Which was Charles Dickens time travel story?

Got it? It was, of course, A Christmas Carol. Scrooge travelled back and forwards in time from the beginning to the end of his life.

If you didn’t get the answer it’s because I was deliberately misleading when asking the question. Time travel makes people think of science fiction, and A Christmas Carol isn’t science fiction (here’s a small taste of why not). And besides, Dickens didn’t write SF

I’m not a fan of time travel stories, I’ve only written one that I can remember (“The Blue Magnolia” – originally published in The Third Alternative 22), although admittedly I do play around with the concept in my current Fair Exchange stories

But no one will ever travel in time. I can prove it.

Go to Spotify or Apple Music, or possibly your record collection, and find the album Sunday at the Village Vanguard by the Bill Evans Trio.

Sunday at the Village Vanguard is reckoned to be one of the best live jazz recordings ever, and I agree. I love Bill Evans. If I had a time machine then this would definitely be on my must-see list.

Listen to the track “Alice in Wonderland”. You can hear the crowd talking throughout most of this album, but it’s particularly noticeable on this track during Scott LeFaro’s bass solo. If I was at this concert I would know that LeFaro was going to be killed in a car accident in eleven days time. I would want to tell the people around me to be quiet. And not just me, all the other Bill Evans fans who had traveled back in time would do the same. In fact, there would be so many of us that the regular crowd wouldn’t have got in.

So there you are. The fact you can hear the chatter shows there is no time travel.

Actually, the SF writer in me can’t let the above passage go unchallenged. If all of us Bill Evans Trio fans were listening in silence, I suspect the performance would have been very different. We’d have changed the performance just by observing it. That’s the trouble with time travel stories, you can’t pin them down. They keep wriggling into different shapes as you write them.

I read recently that people enjoy things more in memory than they do in the moment. I don’t know if this is such a bad thing. Who knows what those fans were talking about in the recording? The trouble they had getting there? Their worries about work the next day?

It’s nice to imagine them looking back later on and just remembering the good parts of the gig. As Joni Mitchell said, You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.


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It’s beginning to look a lot like…


… Bad Christmas Movies

My family love bad Christmas movies.

I don’t mean bad Christmas movies like Love Actually where they have the time and budget to allow the cast to do their thing and then to edit the thing properly at the end. (Many things irritate me about this film, but I love the scene where Rowan Atkinson takes forever to wrap a Christmas present.)

Nor am I talking about bad bad Christmas movies where cast and crew are are just going through the motions.

No, I’m talking about good bad Christmas movies. The sort of movie which has all the ingredients, they just don’t have time and budget to put them together properly. The sort of film where the script talks about the evil Bolton Brothers who run an evil business, but the budget only runs to one of them showing up on screen.

What I love about these films is that they understand what the audience wants and they try to deliver it.

There’s a female lead who hasn’t had a relationship for some time.

She has a best friend who tells her to put herself out there and so she heads off to a small town (possibly her home town, possibly a town in New England or Scotland, occasionally a village near a castle in a small Kingdom in Europe)

The clock starts ticking, counting down to Christmas day.

The lead meets a Prince, a Lord or a Duke in disguise. If none are available she’ll settle for a handsome carpenter who is good with kids.

For some reason there will be a baking competition.

On Christmas Eve, it will start to snow.

And then she will realise she has met her man.

I have no problem with films that follow a structure. The first stories I placed were romances, sold to UK women’s magazines.

I learned a lot by writing them: if two people are going to fall in love in a romance, you have to make them attractive both to the reader and each other. Beginner writers, when confronted by something difficult (and getting your characters right is difficult) have a habit of dodging this by changing the structure.

Changing the structure can be fantastic, but not in this case.

I saw a film called Hot Frosty recently.

In it, a lonely woman builds a snowman who comes to life. He’s a good looking guy, totally ripped with great abs. The other women are jealous of this Hot Frosty.

And all I could think was, why don’t they build their own snowman? What if they did, and the town was suddenly filled with hot snowmen? What would the regular men do?

But this wasn’t a bad SF film. It was a bad Christmas movie. People watching this film (and I include myself in this) didn’t want internal logic. If they did they wouldn’t be watching a film where a snowman came to life.

If you’re looking for some ideas on what to write over the coming weeks, then I would recommend the following: write a straight love story. Or given the time of year, write a Christmas love story. Learn the structure and follow it. It’s excellent practice.